Becca Stories

1.  Becca was mad at me for taking something away from her tonight. I pulled her into my lap to give her a kiss and told her 'You're snuggly and I love you.' She pulls away and says 'I NOT snuggly! I NOT love you anymore!' I forced myself to act hurt and not burst out laughing, LOL.  (Becca is 6.)

2.  I've noticed Becca 'sneaking' around the kitchen.  Edging along a wall or under the counter and then peaking out to see if anyone sees her about to make a snack.  I was laughing and saying to Bill she looks like a little ninja.  In the middle of saying 'I don't know where she could have gotten the idea from'  - ping - lightbulb moment.  At school Becca has started wanting to walk to her 1st grade class by herself ("No Mommy!  Not you!")  I want to encourage her independence, but no way can I trust her on her own yet.  So I follow behind her, peeking around walls and corners.  Guess I'm not as subtle as I thought!!

Reading Comprehension

Question posted by someone on the Listen-Up email group:

I have a friend who has a child who is deaf, CI user, oral/does not sign much at all and in third grade.  Her child reads at grade level but the reading comprehension is at a first grade level.  They are considering holding back a year and Mom doesn't want that to happen. Any programs or ideas on how to work with reading comprehension with this child?

My thoughts:

Reading comprehension is a very broad term.  I would want to know where in the process the child is faltering.

You say the child can read on grade level.  What does that mean?  Recognizing words in a flash card environment?  Sounding out unfamiliar words?

My son is in 3rd grade, and darn some of the reading comprehension questions are really hard!  And subtle.

So how do you get from point A, verbalizing a word you see on a flash card, to point B, answering an inferential question, ie. infer from paragraph 3 Jack's true intention in hiding the pumpkin before his sister came home from school.

Any of these points could cause a 'failure' of comprehension:

Does not understand complex grammar

Does not understand possessive and/or plural s  (this is an issue for my son)

Lack of vocabulary

Test anxiety

Test taking skills

Poor phonics - if child mainly learns words as 'sight' words vs. being able to sound them out, school will only get harder as time goes on

Poor understanding of the parts of words (un- , pre-, -ed, etc)

Lack of time - some issues with any of the above and needs extra time to think it all thru and pull it together

I could go on, but you get the idea.

How is comprehension being tested?  Multiple choice?  Free hand writing?  Does child do better with one or the other?  ie.  If gets multiple choice questions right, maybe it is a language expression issue.

How is the child's speech?  Are they able to orally hear a story and then reply verbally with inferences and conclusions?  It may not be reading comprehension per se, but language comprehension.

And finally, plain old quantity of reading time - read to child, read with child, child read alone.  (You know, that it takes 10,000 hours to become a true master of a skill)  So for instance, a conservative estimate for a typical 8 year old (advantaged) child that has been read to or reading to himself a minimum of 30 min a day from birth.  That would put him at about 1500 hours of reading so far.  If the child you are talking about missed out on months, maybe years of reading before hearing loss was handled, may need lots of extra reading now to make it up.

Good luck

What Not To Do - My Version

I read a What Not To Do list by Melanie Wilson and liked the idea.  So here's my list thus far.

• Have cream cheese and chips in my house or possession at the same time
• Make brownies or fudge unless I am OK with eating it all myself
• Organize our weekend plans counting on having my husband participate.  (He gets called away too often)  There should always be a mom-only backup plan.
• Speak (or type) in anger.  Wait.  Breathe.
• Average less than 7 hours of sleep a night.
• Think that there is only one right thing to do or one right way.  A parent delights in seeing their child's drawing, and doesn't have some preconceived notion of the perfect result.  Thus it is with God and our lives.

My Life is Good Too!

I have a T-shirt with a cartoon of a man and dog running, with the words "Life is Good!"

I wore it yesterday and Becca, 6, was checking it out.  "What this say Mommy?" she asked me, pointing to the words.  I told her.  And I said "Because life is good and Daddy gave it to me to make me happy."  She laughed, that tickled her funny bone I guess.  She stood up straight, pointed to her chest as if she were wearing the shirt, and says "My life is good too!" with a big grin.  It sure is!

(Picture added from Halloween)

Baby Snoopy

I'm throwing out an old mini diaper bag.  It's one Bill had carried in his car for emergencies.  I found it in the garage from the last time he'd cleaned his Xterra out.  Still packed with size 6 pullups and size 4 clothes for Becca.

The "baby snoopy" theme on the bag brings back memories - of a time of wonder being pregnant with Joey.  After 4 years of infertility, it was amazing to think we were actually going to have a baby.  I liked the baby snoopy items because it was blue for a boy, and because our dog Crocket was a beagle.  It was the first 'theme' I saw and liked and gosh that decision was the easy part :-)

When I was looking at the bag today, and the picture, I thought, was that time real?  After the hard years of infertility, and before the hard realities of real parenthood - Joey's gag reflex and constant throwing up, Down syndrome, hearing loss. 

Venting - Haircuts

ARGH Becca's hair is is is is is such a pain!  She hates having her hair cut.  Last time we took her for a cut the hair dresser she's always gone to had changed salons.  So we went to the new salon.  I told the woman to just trim Becca's bangs, thinking that was enough to attempt on the first visit to the new location.

Well, that left the back 'long' for her and getting longer every day.  And the longer it gets, the more tangles every morning.  After I wrenched my hand a few weeks ago trying to get Becca to stand still and brush her hair at the same time, even the morning hair brushing became a 3 person affair - we go in and wake up Daddy.  He holds her still and I spray on detangle spray and brush as gently as I can.  While she yells and cries and THRASHES back and forth.

I finally couldn't take it anymore, and what would we do when Bill was finally called out on an early assignment and it was just me and Becca?  So anyway took her for a cut today.  And it was awful.  Awful.  And this stupid new place (JC Penney's) is bigger.  And very busy.  With a full house audience for the show.  Not that anyone said anything, but still.

Yelling, screaming, crying, thrashing.  Daddy holding her hands, me holding her face still.  She doesn't cry the whole time.  She and Daddy were giggling and talking nose to nose part of the time.  But even when she's not crying, she's still not really 'still'.  At least her hair is short now.  Very short.  And her bangs are really really short.  I can't blame Andrea the hair dresser, she did the best she could.  But poor Becca is scalped.  Just in time for pictures this week.  ARGH.  argh argh argh.

What have I done wrong??  Becca gets her teeth brushed just fine.  She even lets me floss her teeth!  She drinks her own medicine now!  She lets me put drops in her ears!!  Why can't we get past this hair thing???

When Glasses are a Bigger Deal than Down Syndrome

Last Friday Bill and I took Becca for an eye doctor appointment.  This was a long and unpleasant ordeal, but the end of the story is that she has a prescription for glasses.  She is far sighted.

So that night, Joey asks me, in all (whiny) seriousness, "Mom, why do I have to have a geeky sister that has to wear glasses?"  On the inside, I'm ROFL, thinking, um, hello?  Have you noticed the bright green hearing aids in your own ears or the fact that your sister has Down syndrome? 

But those things are just normal in his life.  Heaven forbid glasses!  What will people think??

Anyway, I couldn't say that to him.  I just told him matter of factly that Becca needs glasses to see better, that lots of people wear them, and it's not that big a deal.